２級ライティングの採点をお願いします。できれば添削も。 採点の際理由も教えていただけると嬉しいです。よろしくお願いし…

Question

２級ライティングの採点をお願いします。できれば添削も。
採点の際理由も教えていただけると嬉しいです。よろしくお願いします。TOPIC Do you think, in the future, robots will do most jobs？
（point：cost, technology, safety）

回答

I think, in the future, robots will do most jobs.I have two reasons. First, today's advanced technology enables robots to work everyday without taking a rest. As a result, since robots can work more efficiently than people, many companies will want to use these robots. Second, in this aging society, it is necessary to increase the working population. This is especially important for workplaces that need many workers, such as construction sites. By making use of robots,people can solve these problems. For these reasons,I believe robots will do more and more jobs in the future.

Answer 1

とても良く書けていると思います。
素晴らしい!!
全項目3/4かな。